God of pilgrims, give us always a table to stop at
where we can tell our story and sing our song.
John Giuliani
Welcome to Becky’s table.
I’m approaching eighty. At this time of life, it is natural for me to consider the legacy I will leave behind. A Statute with Limitations is my way of leaving a footprint in the sands of time.
Becky Starr is my pseudonym or pen name. Some forty years ago, I vowed to write this story after I was denied my day in court because of the statute of limitations. I needed to tell my story in order to heal. I thought other people needed to hear it also. I believe that silence about sexual abuse only makes matters worse. The hurt doesn’t just go away.
After attempting to write a memoir and a documentary, I chose instead to write a novel that would be generic in nature, creating almost a 21st century morality play. Stories, it seems, touch the soul and that’s what I want to do – touch the soul of my readers.
In real life, it’s impossible to know what motivates people and as a writer I wanted to get inside my characters’ heads. I want you, my reader, to do the same. One must be almost godlike to do that so I created Themis and Justice to oversee that journey into my characters’ interior.
Who I am
I’m still evolving. I can at least share where I’ve been so far. I draw from my background as an elementary and adult educator by trade, a facilitator of community support groups, and experience as a psychiatric aide in a mental institute. My first degree is in psychology, my advanced study in the fields of administrative leadership and women’s studies. I am mother, wife, volunteer, friend and advocate. I am now retired from paid employment so I have time to do the things I like: enjoy nature, spend time with family, play Words with Friends, volunteer, travel, write, participate in book clubs.
I am a survivor. Until the day I die, I will speak out in defense of those who have been sexually abused by those in power positions. I have experienced Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome so I know what that is like, but I have also known Post Traumatic Growth and believe strongly in it.
Who I am not
Though psychology is my first love, I am not a therapist. I cannot advise you or heal you.
What I can do
I am an educator, a writer. What I can do is teach and hopefully inspire. I will listen to what you have to share. Maybe answer some questions. I advise you not to use the name of any perpetrator who has not been convicted in any correspondence as this could be legally unwise to do so.
I can also offer you resources that I have found useful. I hope you find them helpful to you.
What I cannot do
I can’t undo what happened to you or someone you loved. Sexual abuse is a life-altering experience. Anyone who tells you to just forget it happened doesn’t understand that is impossible.